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"You would go against the queen for my sake?"
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"The same reasoning that keeps us safe if we bed each other, keeps me safe if
I leave you alive. She needs my sluagh more than she needs to be vindictive."
He seemed so certain of that last part. Certain of what he was certain of,
uncertain of everything else;
like most of us if we're honest. I looked at that strong face, the jaw a
little wide for my taste, the bones of the cheek at little too sculpted. I
liked a softer look to my men, but he was undeniably handsome. His hair was a
perfect white, thick and straight, held back in a loose ponytail. The hair
fell to his knees like one of the older sidhe, even though Sholto was only
about two hundred years, give or take. The shoulders were broad, the chest
looked good under the white, button-down shirt. The shirt fell absolutely
smooth, and I wondered if he were using some sort of glamour to make it so,
because I knew that what lay under the shirt was not smooth. "The offer is
very unexpected, Sholto. I'd like some time to think about it, if I may?"
"Until tomorrow night," he said.
I nodded, and stood. He stood as well. I found myself staring at his chest and
stomach trying to see that movement I'd noticed on the street. Nothing showed,
he was wasting glamour on keeping it hidden." I
don't know if I can do this," I said.
"What?" he asked.
I motioned at him. "I saw you once without a shirt when I was much younger.
The sight... stayed with me."
His face paled, eyes hardening. He was throwing his walls back in place. "I
understand. The thought of touching me frightens you. I do understand,
Meredith." He let out a long breath. "It was a pretty thought while it
lasted." He turned away from me, gathering his long coat from the back of the
chair where he'd laid it. The heavy tail of hair lay like a white furred
stripe down his body.
"Sholto," I said.
He didn't turn around, just held the length of hair over one shoulder while he
put on his coat.
"I didn't say no, Sholto."
He turned then. His face was still closed, careful, all the emotions I'd
worked so hard to find buried again. "Then what are you saying?"
"I'm saying, no sex tonight, but I can't say yes, I'll have sex with you,
until I see everything."
"Everything?" He made it a question again.
"Now who's being coy," I said.
I watched the idea take shape on his face, in his eyes. A strange little smile
played on his lips. "Are you asking to see me naked?"
"Not all of you." I had to smile at the look on his face. "But down to your
thighs, yes, please. I have to see how I truly feel about your... extras."
He smiled and it was warm with an edge of uncertainty. It was his real smile,
that edge of charm and
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fear. "That is the kindest way anyone has ever described them."
"If I can't be with you in joy and shared pleasure, then your dream of
matching your glow with another falls apart. A sidhe does not glow for things
that are duty and not pleasure."
He nodded. "I understand."
"I hope so, because it's more than seeing you nude. I need to touch and be
touched to see if..." I spread my hands wide. "If I can do this."
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"But no sex tonight?" His voice was as close to playful as I'd ever heard it.
"You dream of sidhe flesh and have never had it. I have had it, and for three,
nearly four years, I've gone without. I miss home, Sholto. Strange and
perverse as it is, I miss it. If I agree to this, then I get a sidhe lover and
home. Not to mention I'm escaping a death sentence. You are not a fate worse
than death, Sholto."
"Some have thought so over the years." He tried to make it a joke, but his
eyes gave him away.
"That's why I need to see what I'm getting myself into."
"Do I raise the question of love, or is that too naive for a king and a
princess?" he asked.
I smiled, but this time it was sad. "I tried love once; it betrayed me."
"Griffin is a worthless thing, Meredith, unworthy of such depth of emotion,
and certainly incapable of returning it."
"I found that out, eventually," I said. "Love is grand while it lasts, Sholto,
but it doesn't last."
We looked at each other. I wondered if my eyes were as tired and full of
regret as his.
"Am I supposed to argue with you, and tell you some love does last?" Sholto
asked.
"Are you going to?"
He smiled, and shook his head. "No."
I held my hand out to him. "No lies, Sholto, not even the pretty ones." His
hand was very warm wrapped around mine. "Let me take you to bed, and see what
I'm bargaining for."
He let me lead him toward the bed. "Do I get to see what I'm bargaining for?"
I pulled him backward toward the bed so I could watch his face. "If you like."
A look passed through his eyes that was neither sidhe, nor human, nor sluagh,
but simply male. "I like,"
he said.
Chapter 12
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I LET GO OF HIS HAND SO I COULD CRAWL ONTO THE BED, STILL WORKING
backward so I could watch him. I took the gun out of my waistband and slid it
under one of the pillows, then lay back in the middle of the bed, propping
myself up on my elbows. Sholto stood beside the bed looking at me. He had a
strange half-smile on his face. His eyes looked uncertain, not unhappy, just
uncertain.
"You look terribly pleased with yourself," he said.
"It's never a bad thing to see a handsome man naked for the first time."
His smile vanished. "Handsome? I've never had anyone who knew what lay under
the shirt call me that before."
I let my gaze speak for me. I lingered over his face, the eyes, the strong,
nearly perfect nose, the thin wide mouth. The rest of the body looked
wonderful, but I knew at least part of what I was looking at was magically
enhanced. I just didn't know how much. But I kept my gaze on the parts that I
was pretty sure were real, like the slender width of his hips, the strong
length of legs. Until I saw him without the pants I wasn't sure what the bulge
in the pants was, so I passed that by in mind as well as by eye. The queen was
right, it was a shame; he truly was magnificent.
"I've fantasized about a sidhe woman looking at me like that." He still looked
too solemn.
"Like what?" I asked. I made the question low, sexual, teasing.
That made him smile. "Like I'm something to eat."
I smiled, and made it everything he wanted it to be, everything he needed it
to be. "Eat, eh. Lose the coat, and the shirt, and maybe we'll get to that."
"No sex tonight remember," he said.
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"How about just no orgasm?"
He threw back his head and laughed, a loud, joyous sound. He looked at me with
shining eyes, and it wasn't magic that made them glitter, just laughter. He
looked younger, more relaxed. I realized that with his white hair and skin,
those gold eyes, that he'd be welcomed at the Seelie Court. If he could keep
his shirt on they'd never suspect.
The laughter faded round the edges. "Now you look solemn," he said.
"I was just thinking that you look more Seelie Court than I do."
He frowned. "You mean the blood auburn hair?"
"And my lack of height, and the breasts are a little too plentiful for sidhe
style."
He grinned then, wide and sudden. "It has to be the women who are complaining
about the breasts. No man would dream of it."
That made me smile. "You're right. My mother, my aunt, my cousins."
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"They're just jealous," he said.
"Pretty to think so," I said.
He let the grey overcoat fall to the floor, then undid a button of his cuff.
He watched my face while he did it. He undid the other sleeve, and moved to [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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